So, I have come to realize on this journey that people will try you.  Some will try you just to discourage you.  But, it's important to remember that oftentimes when people act ill, rude, or mean that it's a spirit working through them. 

It's important to safeguard your thoughts, your heart, and your dreams.  If it appears you can be broken by destroying your character.  Someone will try to do it.  If it seems you will break easily by being misled.  Well, expect that to happen too.  Ultimately, anything that you love, cherish, and look to build within your life  just understand that you need to be on guard 24-7!  Someone is going to come your way to either try to take it from you or make you believe you're not able to obtain it.  Trust!

Who are these people you may wonder?  I refer to them as vibe killers, dream stealers, and bottom line"Haters"!  The quicker you can recognize a Hater, the better off you are.  Hateration can stem from jealousy, envy, or simply low self esteem.  People look at what I do everyday and wonder how do I stay so positive.  How can I have such faith?  Why don't I get discouraged when things take longer than anticipated? Or, when a rainy day occurs and my pesos don't stretch as long as I'd like them to, how can I still have a smile on my face?  My answer is simple.  I have the utmost faith in God! 

I experienced death first hand.  Therefore, I'll be the first to tell you ALL of these earthly possessions are temporary and you can't take any of them with you.  Therefore, I don't put my faith, trust, or belief in man.  I only place my trust in God.  I know at that end of the day he'll make a way.  He always does.  Whatever I'm going through, it's only temporary. And, it's not over until he says it's over!

Just recently someone tried to shoot down my dream.  Am I surprised? No.  The enemy's goal is to try to make us give up.  I've learned we have to be on our P's and Q's at all time. Believe in God and believe in yourself. Pray for your Haters.  The real reason Haters hate is because they are not at peace with themselves.  They lack faith.  And, they stay in a constant state of uncertainty and/or turmoil.  Remember: hurt people, hurt people. (Yeah that's true).  That's why they're coming for you.   Some people envy that light shining in you. But, don't let their malicious words steal your joy.  Pray for their healing and pray for your breakthrough.  Live passionately.  Love passionately.  And, never give up!  When someone tell you that you won't be able to do something, work that much harder to prove them wrong.  With God on your side you will never fail.  Just remember with man it is impossible.  But, not with God.  For with God, ALL things are possible!

Be blessed!

(P.S.) Don't forget to share this blog with someone who could really benefit from it on Facebook/Twitter/etc.  Each one teach one.  :)


I know I am not the only one faced with this challenge.  We all set New Year's Resolutions.  We even set day to day goals.  I find myself going hard in the paint initially; not missing a beat.  Then slowly yet surely, the winds will change and I'm back in the murky waters of inconsistency.

It's something I'm slowly trying to overcome.  Just like I have the most difficult time not cursing.  I don't know why I like some of the colorful less lady like words.  But, I do.  I'm not perfect.  And, sometimes those are just the words that effectively get your point across.  Then, I remember my experience and I feel like I have to live this straight and narrow path.  It can be so hard sometimes.  Partying, clubbing, and being care free was so much easier.  It took way less thought.  But, it added way more heartache, embarrassing, and compromising moments.  I'm sure some of you can relate on some level.

So here we are.  Yep.  And, I'm trying to be way more consistent.  Some days are better than others.  And, other days just well....  are. 
Every year I feel like something major is going to happen.  To a certain degree, it always does.  Maybe not like I expected.  But, some unexplained event comes into play.  

Well, I'm looking forward to more consistency.  I've already started volunteering a little more.  I've tried working on my anger issues.  And, I'm getting fuzzy feelings from it all.  Cursing is going to be a hard one to erase completely.  I can only try.  Then, I like to remind myself that Peter in the bible used to curse and he was still a Disciple.  A work in progress is what I am.

Until next time.......consistency is key. 

Peach and blessing.  (I meant to type peace but a typo kicked in.  Then, when I actually thought about it, it looked pretty funny written as peach).  :)


Okay.  So, now time to begin the phases of transparency in sharing God's existence and his love.  In doing so, I've also become more comfortable sharing my experience with more friends, family, and strangers alike.  I think the most refreshing part is hearing people say, "When can I read it?!"  That's total inspiration!

I will keep you updated on the process.  I'm wrapping up the Proposal stages now.  I'm super excited and amped.  I know it's in God's hand.  <teeth>.


Like many, I doubted and questioned God’s existence.  Prior to my near-death experience, I was very rebellious, defiant, living care-free and wanted absolutely nothing to do with the institution of religion.  Therefore, after dying and entering back into the earthly realm, I found myself scared, shocked, and confused faced with an overabundance of questions.   Of course the primary one being...why me?!   I wasn’t sure how to transition from a total life of sin (living a reckless lifestyle) to one of accountability, holiness, and righteousness.  Therefore, I kept quiet to alleviate judgment.  It was easier that way.  It was less scrutiny to endure.  And, I didn't have to be a target of ridicule or engage in exhausting conversations to prove God is actually real.  Being a private person, I was terrified to reveal such a personal experience.  It would require opening up about my life, my death, and failures. Who wants to do that?!  Ultimately, it would mean sharing every aspect of my life with the world. Believe me, there's a major expectation and cross to bear when you've been blessed to have such an experience. Then, factor in the ultimate blessing to hear our creator's voice!  It was overwhelming.  It was riveting.  And, I was petrified! 

For a long time, I struggled with my experience. I wasn't sure what God wanted me to do with our encounter. I simply thought that he wanted me to change the way I had lived from a reckless platform to forming a closer relationship with him. Yet, as I silently continued my walk, I realized that  more was required. I wasn't fulfilling my purpose. I wrote television and film treatments for Independent Producers and still felt unfulfilled. I went through my daily life and it felt like something was missing.  Then, I decided to step out on faith. I felt the holy spirit pushing me.  I actually wrote a book about my experience after my friend pressed me for months.  It's funny how even after I completed the book, I still put it off.  I didn't pitch it out of fear.  Until, I met a middle aged editor from rural Iowa. That's when I had an ah-ha moment! I knew she would be perfect from a contrast perspective. She was a Christian and less likely to think my claim was insane. But could she relate?  Especially considering my experience dealt with growing up in Detroit as a teen, exposed to the fast life, violence, peer-pressure, drug dealers, drive by shootings, teen deaths, teen pregnancies and the list goes on. But, when she called that same night and told me that she couldn't put my book down (finishing it the same evening).  I knew it was a story that had to be told.
Please understand, if you are struggling with your spiritual walk, that you are not alone. I continue to pray and grow stronger as I prepare to take the main stage in sharing my story. Thank you for following me on this journey.  I welcome your comments and encouragement.  Please be sure to share this page on your Facebook, Twitter, Blog, and email.  Word of mouth is truly the best way to share God's goodness and his word. 

Stay tuned and be blessed!

T. Marie Bell